Comforted

Comforted

Meaning: (verb) To soothe, console or reassure, to aid, support, or encourage

(Noun) A feeling of relief or consolation, a state of ease and satisfaction of bodily wants, with freedom from pain and anxiety.

Synonyms: aid, assist, confirm, console, free, nourish, soothe, etc.

Antonyms: annoy, bother, distress, trouble, irritate

To feel comforted. Isn’t this what we all long for? I see too many people feeling troubled, annoyed, bothered, distressed, and irritated by life circumstances that are out of their control. If we can make changes; we procrastinate, and look for changes that bring temporary relief. Is it any wonder that some people look for comfort in drugs, alcohol, and food, (to name a few)? I have turned outside of myself many times in the past looking for a quick fix to the sadness’s I have suffered and the losses I wanted found. There have been times when I wondered why the world kept spinning¿ I mean here I was, stuck in the axis of hell, alone, afraid, unwanted and everyone else just kept on living, ``What is up with this¿`` I wondered. I did not feel comforted. I did not know how to comfort myself with feelings, so I tried comforting myself with substance, but this did not work.

 I have given this emotion more heart-felt thought than any other so far. There was a time when comforted was not something I chose to feel. I did not know that I had to go to comfort; I thought that comfort should find me. I guess from time to time it did, but did it ever stay? No. Today it is with me but it is only because whenever I catch myself feeling irritated or troubled I immediately walk to comfort and embrace it.

The other day I asked myself; “How can someone experience comforted if they do not have the object that is associated with it, take a blanket for example…I was feeling chilly so I sat in the corner of the sofa and hugged my knees to my chest. I envisioned myself surrounded in warmth. I closed my eyes and let myself retreat into the moment, just me, as is, peaceful in my mind. What I found was instant comfort. Comfort I realized is in the present moment. It is what we want it to be; it is a state of mind. I ask myself what does someone who lives a comforted life look like¿

Comfortable people will awake on a bed, on the floor, or wherever they may be and know that what comforts them is their thoughts. As they go about their day they may feel anxious, bored, sad, needy, and let down, but during these times they will not look for instant comfort, rather they will let these feelings surface, meet them, and greet them, and then say good-bye to them as comfort takes over once again. These people are comforted by the idea that everything comes and goes and that the only way to release negative feelings is to comfort them away with positive emotions.

Rule One: Comfort is a state of mind. Be mindful of what you are feeling.

Rule Two: Long term comfort is not found outside the self.

Rule Three: Comfort yourself mentally; it is the only way to achieve physical results.

Comforted is an emotion we long for, one many of us do not know how to hold on to. I believe it is called perseverance; you just keep inviting comfort in. Today I let myself be comforted by the simple things; my breath, my sight, the sense of smell, even if it was rotting food as I took out the trash. I watched my puppy lying at my feet, comforted by simply knowing that I was nearby. I rubbed behind her ear and she woke up, ``I know you care,`` her eyes told me. She was feeling comforted, this I knew.

Rule Four: Scratching behind someone ear will not just comfort them, it will comfort you as well. Give comfort away.

I realize how hard it is for us to be comfortable all the time, even a Buddhist monk is bound to feel discomfort. Mentally however, we are what we feel. Like any other positive emotion, if we want it to stick around we need to look for ways to disconnect from its negative form so that the positive has a place to dwell.

Rule Five: Comfortable is often found in the uncomfortable. Do not allow destructive, temporary remedies to be your comfort.

A long term solution requires dedication, commitment, and perseverance. Comfort is a lifelong goal, a choice, and an emotion that you and I deserve to feel every second of every minute.

Rule Six: Lifelong goals are worth the effort. Make an effort to feel comforted today.