Vulnerable

Vulnerable

Definition: Open to attack

Synonyms: Accessible, exposed, liable, sensitive, ready, susceptible, wide open, unguarded, unprotected

Antonyms: Guarded, protected, safe, secure, closed

Do you cry in public?

Do you laugh in public?

I do! Laughter is a beautiful thing. It ignites the mind, fuels the senses, and leaves us hungry for more.

A while back my daughter and I were at the local dollar store stocking up on “party favors” for her upcoming birthday. On a scale of one to ten I would say that my mood was at “five”. As my little girl spread out her “goods” on the conveyer belt for the cashier to ring through, I noticed that she was smiling, her mood breaking the scales at 10½ at least. Satisfied, I noticed a display of magnets near by and made my way to a pink one, it read:

A woman only needs four animals in her life

A jaguar in the garage

A mink on her back

A tiger in her bed

And a jackass to pay for it all.

I laughed, and laughed, and laughed, by golly I am still laughing. My daughter laughed without even knowing why she was laughing. I read the magnet to the cashier and she laughed. I called my husband and my friends and soon everyone was laughing. “Well hot damn” I thought, as my mood quickly escalated to eleven, “Laughter really is the best medicine.”

Later, I reflected on what I had read, but the words no longer felt “politically correct”. “Pita” would have a hay-day with the mink phrase. Providers everywhere would wonder if they are being considered jackasses? Women may conclude that it is being suggested that they cannot afford a Jaguar without a man’s money. Yet others might wonder if the lyrical magnet is saying that a “Jaguar, as a car” defines you. You see what I mean? Suddenly the laughter and the fun has turned to utter confusion. Nowhere on this magnet does it say that the jackass is a “man” yet I bet that most people will assume this and forget about the fun of it all.

I chose to tell you this story during a “vulnerability” emotion because I believe in the days when we would wear these saying on t-shirts, print them on fridge magnets, and advertise them on car stickers. I believe that we used to have more fun, back in the day when being “politically correct” wasn’t even an issue.

Today it seems that we are too serious, we are afraid of attack, scared of what others may think of us. “What will they say?” We wonder as we throw out the t-shirts, tear up the sticky stuff, and pack away the “unpolitically correct” knick knacks of years gone by. Personally, I don’t want to be “politically correct”. I want to have my own opinion. I like knowing that my opinion may be different from yours and it feels good knowing that it can change on a whim. Today, my vulnerable opinion is this:

The car was named after the jaguar for its precision and speed.

The mink probably replaced the security, softness, and warmth that the woman wearing it thought she was lacking.

The tiger, though ferocious and hungry, protects its mate.

The jackass is simply a stubborn sort of donkey who does not like doing what it is asked to do.

This is my vulnerable opinion, and like I said, it may change. After all words are just words. Maybe we need to read between the lines?

At the end of the day as I think, and think, and think, (yes sometimes I think too much) about this whole vulnerability emotion my thoughts take my heart to the people who entertain us, people like Justin Bieber, Miley Cyrus, Madonna, the late Michael Jackson, and the list goes on. We sing with them, we dance with them, we praise them, we love them, we support them, and we envy them. Their guarded show of emotions keeps us happy. We expect them to be politically correct and vulnerable at the same time. Then one day some of theses entertainers are photographed “being human”. They stumble and fall. And then, we criticize them. We stop buying their music. Basically, while they are being vulnerable we want them to be ashamed of themselves. How does this make any sense? What if we listen the music no matter what? What if we allow ourselves to remember why we once liked Justin Bieber, Miley, Madonna, our next-door neighbor, our husband. Chances are that Justin Bieber, for example, still believes in “Never Say Never” even if he is jumping off cliffs and smoking “homemade” cigarettes. Vulnerability opens doors. If we are too guarded we will be living in the locked up garage with the jaguar. So just for today let your guard down, laugh, be a jackass. Cry in public.

Do you cry in public?

 I do! And the sad thing is that when someone sees me crying they turn the other way and pretend not to notice. They don’t know what to say. Their vulnerability is in the garage with the Jaguar, and the mink, and the tiger, and it is being held hostage by the jackass. 

The real question is this. How do you want to live your life? What emotions will carry you through today? Will you choose to let your guard down and let vulnerability lead the way? I hope so. I for one do

not want to find myself locked up in the garage with all of the wild, hungry animals that are in there. I want to laugh a lot, dance some, sing along. But mostly, I do not want to be afraid to cry in public. So if you see me crying, please do not turn the other way. Chances are I was laughing so hard I cried.  And you may be missing a great opportunity to laugh along with me.